Staying Happy in Your Forties and Beyond

in Relationships

By Eileen Tan and Ui Wei Teck (guest contributors)

In this article, when we talk about the second half of your life, we are referring to age forty to eighty. We assume that you will have an average life span of eighty years, and focus on what you need to do before and during the ages of forty to sixty.

At this stage, your children are growing up, searching for their own identities, and moving on to the next phase in their lives. They no longer follow the house rules you have set, and may be looking for excuses not to attend some family activities. They may tell you that they don’t want to live the lives you have planned for them.

Happiness levels tend to bottom when you are in your mid-forties

Unexpected wedding
(photo: josemanuelerre)

Typically, happiness levels start to decline and reach a low point around the mid-forties. This is the phase when boredom starts to occur as your learning curve has flattened. This is the time you realize that you may not stay employable for life and start to worry about how to keep the same lifestyle if you were to lose your job.

This is the phase we generally call the “Mid-Life Crisis”, the period when your life curve is flat or moving downwards if you do not manage it well. This is the time when you realize that life may be more than halfway over and start to think that it doesn’t matter anymore. Some may experience grief due to death of their parents or others. Some may experience their children leaving the home. Some may experience unemployment or underemployment. Some may lose motivation in work or life due to losing interest in their job, or are no longer able to maintain their living standard. Most people are unprepared for a mid-life crisis as the changes are unexpected.

It is important to see beyond having a happy family and a good job during your younger days. There will always be failures in our life’s journey. Some will achieve success, some never, because they give up after one or two setbacks. By understanding when and how to re-evaluate our lives and how to re-assess our goals, we will have the desire to make significant changes during or prior to the mid-life phase so we can continue to be on the upward trend and maintain or increase our happiness levels. You will then not be unprepared when you move to the second half of your life, which is completely different from the first half of your life.

Most of us want to be successful, prosperous and able to achieve something meaningful in whatever life phase we are in. So the question is:

“What BALANCED lifestyle can lead to happiness?”

2012-04-15 Marathon Rotterdam 2012, R7417, R7420
(photo: Qsimple)

It is when we are able to:

  • Be Fit and Healthy
  • Have Loving Relationships
  • Are Financially Secure and Wealthy
  • Do Work We Enjoy Doing
  • Be Involved in Social Activities

Once you have the mindset of living a balanced lifestyle that leads to happiness and a fulfilled life, you can re-assess everything from your relationships, career, and investments to your body, mind and soul.

When is a good time to start to plan how you want to live the second half of your life? The answer is NOW, and it is never too late to start this learning journey as nobody knows when our last day in this world will be. So every day is a new journey for each of us, where we can grow stronger and wiser to live the remaining balance of our lives with our own blueprint.

Once you have a plan, you can direct your energy to achieve the destiny you have defined for yourself. For us, our destiny is being Selfless Multi-Millionaires. We focus on sharing and growing people around us, including needy families and the Children’s Home. We also share our financial literacy regularly to inspire others to live a rich and joyful life.

What about you? What is your destiny?

Ask yourself: “How do I want to be remembered by others?”


By Eileen Tan and Ui Wei Teck, authors of Enjoying Mid-Life Without Crisis.

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